There is this overwhelming propensity, oddly enough by people with penises most often, to assert that I shouldn’t be frustrated with the lack of emotionally mature men who are available to date.  They seem to feel like, “Oh, you just haven’t found the right one yet,” is sufficient to excuse away the vast majority of Black men who are unwilling to even put in the work to be a partner in a committed, healthy relationship, that the problem is not Black men’s emotional immaturity but somehow, the problem is MY inability to be patient.   How in the holy ever-loving hell am I supposed to form a relationship if Black men aren’t willing to get up off their stagnant, stunted, immature asses and put in the work to be a decent partner?  The problem is NOT me and my inability to wait for Mr. Right.  The problem is that brothas who would otherwise be amazing partners but for their refusal to act and behave like real adult men who are not invested in forming emotional partnerships with women who have done the emotional work to be a good partner in a relationship.  The problem is, they would rather choose the easy lay or the big booty, or the superficial beauty, or the emotionally submissive woman who doesn’t require anything of them.  The problem is not my inability to wait.  No, not at all.  The problem is a community of Black men who don’t see the value and benefits in working towards building a long-term relationship with a woman of substance who demands excellence (excellence, not perfection) in her partner.